Fog Brain…oops I mean brain fog

Brain Fog Bananagrams. Photo by Jess B.

I didn’t intend this post to be about brain fog and ME / CFS but it is.

I wanted and intended to write a post in response to an article that appeared in the Sunday Times Magazine on 5th May 2013. The article was entitled “Hate Campaign” with the sub heading: “This man faced death threats and abuse. His crime? He suggested M.E. is a mental illness.” The ‘man’ the article is referring to here is Professor Simon Wessley, a British psychiatrist specializing in ME / CFS who has purportedly suffered death threats and all kinds of harassment as a result of his work in this field. (If you’re interested you can read an extract of the article on the ME Association’s website, but the full text of the article itself is behind a pay wall on the Times’ own website).

The article ran to some six pages and left me feeling bewildered, confused and angry. I struggled to read and understand the article. I read it in stages and numerous times before I felt my brain had actually understood the article’s premise. In part my own brain fog was to blame but also the article wasn’t particularly informative, fair or balanced. It was in essence a bizarre take on a tiny fringe aspect of ME/CFS.

But in trying to formulate a more detailed and informative response to this article for my post, I hit a brain fog wall. I knew what I wanted to say, but I couldn’t seem to get it out of my head and onto the screen. My head felt foggy and clogged up, almost as if there was lots of fluff blocking where my brain is or lots of liquid sloshing around inside.

I’ve experienced bad brain fog in the past, but nothing as seemingly acute as this. Here I literally felt like I’d run up against a brain fog brick wall. It was an absolute limit. My brain felt like it was straining inside my head in trying to get what I wanted to say out.  So I’ve set aside the article and that post idea for another day down the line, when hopefully I’ll be less fogged.

100% chance of brain fog! Image credit: cafepress.com (via pinterest)

As I say I’ve experienced brain fog in the past, but thankfully it’s never been one of my most crippling symptoms. I often struggle to find the word I want to say. The word is there inside my head, but just out of reach, I can’t quite get it. I have plenty of ‘blonde’ and confused moments which I put down to brain fog. In a discussion about the news or some other ‘higher’ level topic, I often find it difficult to follow what the other person is saying. I’ll find that I’ve zoned out and lost the thread of the conversation. If I’m reading, especially if it’s a long or more serious article or book, I often zone out or have to reread paragraphs to actually process them. I also forget things and write copious lists to combat this. If there is more than one conversation going on in a room at once, I find it really hard to concentrate on the conversation I’m having with the others going on in the background. Ditto with the radio on in the background.  I’m sure there are more examples I could give of my brain foggyness, but right now I’m struggling to remember them…..

I find brain fog, like so many other ME/CFS symptoms is variable and has it’s own peaks of severity. And I know some of the things I’ve described (forgetfulness for example) affect non-ME/CFS sufferers too. But ME/CFS definitely makes the situation worse.

I have some tips/tools that I use to help combat brain fog:

• I read magazines and blogs more than books as I find the articles and posts easier to understand and read. They’re more manageable because they’re shorter.
• I also tend to read ‘lighter’ topics such as yoga, food and health.
• I find word games such as Bananagrams help ease symptoms by distracting me in a fun and light way. Though on really bad brain fog days, the Bananagram letters scramble on the table in front of my eyes and I find I can’t quite focus on them or form them into legitimate words.
• I tend to watch episodes of TV dramas rather than films. Self contained episodes are easier to follow than the narrative and thread of a longer film. If I do watch films I only watch them in 40 minute or so chunks at any one time to ease mental fatigue.
• I learned to play the piano when I was kid. And since I became ill with ME/CFS, even early on in my recovery, I’ve gone back to it. I’ve found playing the piano to be soothing and something I can do on my bad brain days. I only play for 10 minutes or so at a time as it can make the myalgia in my arms worse but I really enjoy it.
• I loved languages at school, especially French. I also learnt German and Latin. I lived in France for most of my Gap Year at 18. My French is now pretty rusty as I haven’t had much opportunity to use it since then. But with the Michel Thomas method (all audio, no writing, I get the CDs out of my local library) I’ve gone back to languages since becoming ill. I did beginners Spanish last year and now I’ve returned to French. The short (10 mins or so) chapters of talking on the programmes are short enough not to tire me out and the repetitive nature of the techniques means its relatively easy, light work for my poor brain, but keeps my brain agile at the same time. The brain is a muscle after all and needs use to keep fit!
• I have short ‘higher’ level discussions with my Dad on topical issues and books. This is a designated and paced activity in my daily routine. In short bursts this is helping me extend my mental ability against the crippling fatigue.
• Most of the time I find blogging soothing too, provided the topic is gentle and not too complicated.
• And of course pacing helps too. Everything I do, including all of things I’ve talked about here, is paced into short periods of time, that I am (very very) gradually increasing.

These things tend to help me, but it does depend on the day and how bad my brain fog and mental fatigue is.

Do you suffer from brain fog and/or mental fatigue? How does it affect you? What do you do to try and ease its effects?