This post has been a long time coming. I’ve written it so many times in my head but somehow not managed to get pen to paper, or fingers to keyboard as it is. Some fear or suspicion has stopped me from sharing until now, hence the radio silence on my blog over the last few months.
But I’m delighted to tell you that I am pregnant, 22 weeks no less! We had our anatomy scan this week and all is well. I am carrying a beautiful bouncy baby girl! Mr B and I are so happy and can’t wait to meet our daughter. She is due on October 12th, the day after Mr B’s birthday. He is hoping she is early and arrives in time to share his own birth date, though I’m not sure we have any control over that!!
Being pregnant is incredibly special for me as back when I was so ill with ME/CFS, as close friends had babies, I was often brought to tears over whether I would ever be well enough to have a child or whether my body would behave and allow me to conceive. I have always known I wanted to have children and be a mother. That feeling has only become stronger, the older I have become. So it was with immense joy and relief that we found out I was pregnant.
Being pregnant is helping me to rebuild trust with my body, something that I lost through the worst years of ME/CFS. Pregnancy is magical and leaves me in many ways in awe of my body, I am after all growing a little person inside me!
So how has my pregnancy been so far? In some respects I’ve been really lucky and am having a really easy pregnancy – no morning sickness just nausea for the first couple of months but in other ways it has been pretty challenging – I suffered with a lot of bleeding weeks 7 – 15 which naturally caused a lot of worry and stress which in turn exacerbated my ME/CFS symptoms. I had a month or more of really not feeling very good and not being up to doing much at all. Now things, touch wood, have settled, my only real complaint is fatigue. It is hard to tell if this is ME/CFS fatigue or pregnancy tiredness, probably a combination. I’m dealing with it by resting a lot and taking much needed afternoon naps. So mostly I’m doing really well. Touch wood, long may it continue.
In the hope that my experience can help others, I plan to write more about my pregnancy and how my ME/CFS is reacting to it. But for now, I’ll leave you with a first photo of our Little Miss!